Why Are My Nuts in the Toilet Water?

 By Bruce Shawkey

Found this book on the Internet. Funny but true. Here is the author's answer;

Gravity, plain and simple. Older men have the same issue women have as they grow older, only our issue is lower on the body. If you wear briefs you may not notice this phenomenon of drooping twins until your pair come in contact with something startling, like a cold, wet encounter in the bathroom. My first encounter nearly caused me to jump up off of the john. If you wear boxers you may have an earlier warning as the twins creep down the inside of your leg over time. Unfortunately there is no good solution for this condition. You can skootch forward and try to rest them on the front rim of the toilet seat. This doesn't always work as the rim may be cold or it can also be slippery, causing the boys to fall back down and into the water, sometimes causing a splash. Using a wash cloth, a nearby magazine or a bunch of wadded up toilet paper strategically placed between the boys and the rim may be a solution here. The other possible solution is to physically hold them up out of the water with your hand. I am currently working on a type of net to keep them dry. I haven't figured out if it should be hooked to the toilet seat or to the upper thighs. Oh well, I'll let you know when and if I get the design worked out. I will most likely sell it on TV with an infomercial. I'll call it something like the "Nut Nest" and sell it for $14.99 plus $5.99 shipping. If you order within a limited time I will throw in a second "Nut Nest" for free. You just pay $5.99 additional shipping. 

I ordered the physical book because for some reason Amazon wouldn't let me order the Kindle edition. I'll see what else he has to say. I'll keep you posted.

Got the book, more like a pamphlet. Mahon is just an average Joe; not a doctor or anything, just a freelance writer. More tongue in cheek than serious. More short chapters on nose and ear hair, skin tags. Read the whole pamphlet in about 15 minutes.

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