Life Lessons Often Learned Too Late

By Bruce Shawkey

Ran across this thought-provoking article on the Bored Panda website about life lessons often learned too late. 

Be careful of who you vent to at work. Just because they listen or show some empathy, it doesn't mean that they're your friend or have your best interests at heart.

OK, I'm retired, so this really doesn't apply to me at this juncture of my life. But I get it. Many is the time I've vented to a co-worker, and it's come back to bite me in the ass.

Working harder than everyone else only means the boss will load you down with even more work.

Again, I'm retired, but I can related as a former salaried employee. As the one with no kids, I was the one who was always asked (and expected) to stay late to meet a deadline (or whatever) while the co-workers with kids got to go home on time.

HR ain't your friend.

Boy, ain't it the truth. After all, they're looking out for the company, not you.

People care much less about you than you would think.

Yes, I consider myself extremely fortunate to have one or two friends who really care. Too many people ask 'How are you?' when they really don't give a shit.

Don’t let stuff pile up. Bills, stuff on your to do list, cleaning, low tire, engine light on, etc. It sounds basic, but getting stuff done as soon as it comes up (as soon as possible) lowers stress and makes life way easier. Stuff doesn’t just go away, and getting it done quickly removes piles of stuff later.

I try to do this, but I confess I'm guilty of letting things go because I'm too tired, too lazy, or whatever. I need to address this, because it's a great feeling of accomplishment to get shit done.

Learn to live alone.

This is kind of a double-edged sword with me. On the one hand, I enjoy the autonomy and living by my wits without all the interference and second-guessing of another person. But there are times I do miss the companionship of another person.

Spend more time with your parents and grandparents. It's easy to overlook how quickly they're growing older while we're busy with our own lives. One day, their absence will hit harder than you can imagine. Cherish the moments you have with them now, before it's too late.

I'm very grateful for the time I spent with my parents and grandparents. I'm only now appreciating the wisdom and life lessons they passed on to me.

A piece of adult advice I wish I'd known sooner is that it's okay to say "no" without feeling guilty. Setting boundaries is crucial for maintaining your mental and emotional well-being, and it's not selfish to prioritize your needs. Learning that you don't have to explain or justify your reasons for declining something can be incredibly freeing and helps you focus on what truly matters to you.

True. There's enough on my plate at any given time. I don't need to take on more.

You're gonna be disliked by people. That's their problem, not yours.

True. I realize I'm not everyone's cup of tea. So fuck 'em. 

It’s ok to not have an opinion on something or to say nothing sometimes.

I remember a line from the movie "Home for the Holidays." It was Charles Durning who said, "Opinions are like assholes honey, everyone has one and everyone else thinks it stinks!"

Practice talking to people and being with people. Social skills can be learned like any other skill! It just takes patience, and practice.

Amen.

There's more to this article, but they're pretty much just variations on a theme.